Filmmaker tells Colorado Springs audience how to overcome the trauma of child sexual abuse | News

When your job is to listen to children, from toddlers to teenagers, talk about their sexual abuse and try to help them overcome this unimaginable hardship, the bright colors of life blend into a muddy slush.

“Of course the work is very hard, but it is also necessary,” says Sarah Hagedorn, clinical director of the forensic medical examiner team at UCHealth Memorial Hospital.

“We often see people on their worst day, but are able to provide them with empathy and trauma-informed care so they can begin to heal,” she said. “We're lucky if at the end of that contact their day is a little better or they can release some of their fears about their health as a result of the abuse. That's compassionate and gratifying.”

Yet often those working in the field of child sexual abuse are unsure of what happens next after they have diligently guided children through the criminal justice system and begun their recovery from psychological and physical wounds that may leave lifelong trauma.

When Emmy-nominated filmmaker Sasha Joseph Neulinger, who lives in Montana, came to Colorado Springs last week for a private screening of his documentary “Rewind,” in which he describes the sexual abuse he suffered at the hands of multiple relatives starting at age four, those in attendance were eager to hear his success story.

“We're in the triage phase, the early stages of what a child victim goes through, so we don't really know how things will play out for the kids,” says Maureen “Mo” Basenberg, executive director of Safe Passage, a nonprofit that built and operates a child protection center that brings together representatives from multiple agencies working on cases in Colorado Springs in one building.

“People like Sasha who come forward and talk about it inspire us to keep going,” said Basenberg.

The organization invited Neulinger to Colorado Springs. He said it was his first visit here.

Neulinger screened his documentary and then participated in a question-and-answer session. The next day, he gave a workshop called “Rediscovering Inner Beauty” as part of Safe Passage's 30th anniversary celebration. In the presentation, he explained the steps he took to confront his past, the impact those actions had on his life, and the lessons he learned from them.

In the audience were some of the more than 70 members of the local team who deal with child sexual abuse cases, including law enforcement officers, medical personnel, Department of Social Services staff, Children's Advocacy Center staff, prosecutors and psychologists.

“We looked for ways to share the impact of a child victim's experience and the healing they received through counseling, and we tried to make connections through art,” Basenberg said.

Neulinger's autobiographical film, in which he examines child abuse across multiple generations, including sexual molestation, is based on old photographs and home videos from the 1990s, as well as recent interviews with his family, his psychiatrist, and prosecutors and detectives who helped him seek justice.

The story doesn't beat around the bush, he said in an interview, which may be difficult for some people to understand.

“It brings the conversation into the mainstream and I'm honored to have had the opportunity to do this,” he said. “Every survivor has their own unique path to understanding what happened to them and figuring out how to move on.”

One realization, he said, is that healing is not a destination but a path that is different for each person and is shaped by the values, desires and choices about the kind of life a person wants to lead.

An estimated one in four boys and one in six girls are sexually abused before the age of 18, but only one in ten abused children discloses what happened to them, he said.

“That means 90% don't, and that's not OK,” Neulinger said. “For a child to overcome trauma, they need the opportunity to disclose it, and they need the support of a child protection center and the community to deal with that trauma.”

From January to July 31, the local counseling center served 457 child abuse victims, compared to 415 child abuse victims during the same period last year, Basenberg said.

When Neulinger was 23 years old and graduated from film school, he took a torturous journey into the dark memories of his mind and began interviewing people who knew more about his childhood than he did, wanting answers to the unresolved and missing pieces.

“I wanted to leave no stone unturned and share that internationally with my film, which was not only validating but also extremely cathartic,” he said. “There was a time when I was afraid to even use my voice, but now that I'm a professional, through film and public speaking, it gives me strength.”

“REWIND,” which Neulinger directed through his production company Step 1 Films, premiered at the 2019 Tribeca Film Festival to positive reviews, premiered on television in 2020, and was nominated for 2021 Emmys in the categories of Outstanding Directing, Outstanding Documentary on a Social Issue, and Outstanding Editing.

Since then, the film has been shown internationally and Neulinger has given over 100 keynote speeches on reforms in child protection and child abuse prevention.

Although it is no longer difficult for Neulinger to talk about his difficult childhood, he knows that it is not a topic that many people want to hear about.

“Ultimately, it's about whether or not we have the courage to face the truth about child sexual abuse,” he said. “It happens, and when these kids have the courage to come forward, we owe it to them to not only listen to them, but to do everything in our power to support them in getting their lives back on track. Organizations like Safe Passage give them the opportunity to do that.”

There are about 1,000 child protection centers like Safe Passage nationwide, and each center varies from district to district, Neulinger said.

“They are the central point of contact in a community where you can get information and be safe,” he said. “And where you can find out what is happening to the child and how you can support them through the organizations involved.”

The Colorado Springs center opened in 2021 as the only center of its kind in Colorado, bringing together agencies such as law enforcement, medical and therapeutic care, and empowerment training on the same site.

In 2017, Neulinger founded Voice For The Kids, an organization that connects the experiences of abused children with the adults who can help them. The company has raised more than $9 million for nonprofits fighting child abuse, he said.

“Any kind of sexual abuse is horrible, but when you're a child just learning what it means to be a human being on this planet and part of our society, and the first, most haunting moment is such a level of pain and betrayal, and you don't have an opportunity to process that and understand that and be able to move on, it doesn't just hurt the child, it hurts all of us,” Neulinger said.

Neulinger, now 34, said he is working to “remove the shame and stigma and have an open and honest conversation about what this is about and what we can actively and concretely do so that people don't have to be defined by their trauma.”

When children don't get the care they need, they fall into a mindset of “I was terrible, I must have done something for this to happen,” Neulinger said. “When you grow up with the idea that you're dirty, bad and guilty, it limits opportunities, healthy relationships and the scope of what you think you deserve in life.”

Kelson Castain, head of the Special Victims Unit of the 4th Judicial District Attorney's Office, said he found the event useful.

“I think about all the cases we work with and wonder where they (the children) are now,” he said. “It's refreshing to know that there are people who have been through this process and see some of the benefits. For us in the prosecutor's office, it's a struggle to think about cases and solutions to find a balance between responsible punishment and closure.”

Neulinger describes his life now as good.

“What I went through as a child was horrible, but I am happily married, have a wonderful son, live in a beautiful part of Montana, have friends, hobbies and a successful career,” Neulinger said. “All of those things are a result of rebuilding a healthy relationship with myself. It took a lot of work, but I want that chance for every child who goes through what I went through.”

“I don't want my result to be the exception. I want it to be the rule.”