Oral sex gave me cancer, but I was lucky and I am grateful

Oral sex gave me cancer.

I have worked as a journalist for four decades. In those years I have written millions of words – but these five words are the hardest I have ever had to type.

I'm a private person and I prefer telling other people's stories to telling my own. Just the thought of going public with such embarrassing, intimate details of my life sends goosebumps down my spine.

The fact that HPV causes almost all cases of cervical cancer is widely known. This is also the main reason why the UK's NHS now offers an HPV vaccination programme, which is recommended for children aged 12 to 13 and for people at increased risk of HPV.

But no one seems to be talking about the causal link with cancer of the larynx and oral cavity. Every year, around 8,600 new cases are diagnosed in men and 3,900 in women.

So I'll say it again: Cunnilingus gave me cancer. To be precise, HPV16-positive oral squamous cell carcinoma of the tonsils.

Most people do not need to RSVP for HPV. The infection rate varies by gender and age, but is estimated to be 90% in sexually active men and 80% in sexually active women.

Almost all of us will come into contact with this microbe within a few months of starting sexual activity – and we won't even know it. It is usually a harmless, symptom-free infection that our immune system will trigger after a year or two.

For reasons still unclear to modern science, HPV chose not to disappear when it passed my lips. Instead, it settled permanently in my left tonsil.

And not content with asserting squatting rights in my house for decades, my secret lodger began remodeling the cell. I'm sure it didn't help that I smoked for 30 years, had the occasional party, and occasionally had a glass (or three) of whiskey.

However, if science says my cancer was caused by bubbles and not hedonism, who am I to disagree? Honestly, I'm not sure it even matters.

If I had the time again, I probably wouldn't change anything. I had too much fun to have too many regrets.

It seems that the only truly safe sex is no sex – and even so-called “safe sex” is fundamentally about how much risk you are willing to take.

Still, I think it's important for more people to know that oral sex can cause cancer – even if it just helps to destigmatize the issue. Hopefully it will also encourage men – who may think their risk of developing throat or mouth cancer is very low – to get any symptoms checked out promptly.

Fortunately, HPV-related mouth and throat cancers are very treatable if detected early enough. Almost a year after my diagnosis, just before my 50th birthday, I am now cancer-free.

Aside from my chronic fatigue, I'm recovering well from chemoradiotherapy and its terrible side effects. And even though cunnilingus gave me cancer – and the brutal treatment that cured me almost ruined me – I feel very lucky.

For many people, the battle against cancer lasts years. As my mother died of bladder cancer over ten years ago, I know only too well that a positive outcome like mine is anything but guaranteed.

I am deeply grateful for the care I have received from the NHS, especially as radiotherapy for cancer has reached its limits due to lack of investment.

Last year, the Daily Express launched a campaign to get the Government to commit to increasing investment in radiotherapy. The Government may have changed, but the need for greater investment in this life-saving drug has remained the same.