4 problems your children face that you never had

The cultural landscape

Raising children in this culture comes with challenges that our parents didn't experience when we were growing up. Our parents took certain things for granted that our generation of parents can no longer do. For example, the idea of ​​”pronoun preference” was unthinkable twenty or thirty years ago.

In today's culture, being a parent can feel like you're sailing in a boat into uncharted waters. The good news is that while the culture presents new challenges for Christian parents, we believe that the Scriptures speak a better, inspired, and authoritative word in which to anchor our parenting.

What is fascinating about the current cultural situation is that even non-Christians agree that many of the biggest changes in our culture pose a massive threat to the well-being of children. This means that raising children is becoming increasingly difficult because it requires living in a culture that, among other things, actively undermines children's innocence and mental health. We should also be encouraged that despite the seemingly very strong headwinds that challenge parents today, the formula for parenting remains quite simple: conscious engagement, tender love, and divine authority.

This raises an important question: What has changed in America's cultural landscape that requires more resolve from Christian parents? Many issues related to this topic could be discussed, but here are four unique pressure points that have changed the landscape for Christian parenting in this generation and require us to strategize how to remain faithful.

1. Sexuality

What has undoubtedly changed most dramatically in recent decades is the magnitude of the moral revolution that has occurred regarding sexuality. Many of the sexual norms we all grew up with and took for granted are now not only rejected and despised, but seen as an attack on a person's sense of identity. In many parts of the country, openly affirming a Christian ethic regarding sexuality is equated with racism. Western culture has displaced the Christian concept of a divine sexual ethic as the overarching moral guardrail for society and replaced it with subjectively defined sexuality. While Christians can affirm the inherent goodness of our sexual design, despair and pain are the inevitable result when society pursues sexuality apart from God's will and God's Word.

Christian parents must actively confront the sexual confusion of our day with a biblical worldview. We should understand our culture's departure from biblical sexuality as a tragic social breakdown. Christians are not motivated by self-righteousness when we present our biblical beliefs about sexuality. No, we are motivated to tell the truth about God's plan for sexuality, marriage, and the well-being of children in the hope that all people will know what it means to thrive and succeed.

2. Identity

Sexuality is linked to the modern notion of identity. Identity language is everywhere. On the one hand, we can affirm the impulse to ground one's identity in the hope of a sense of self-worth and meaning. But on the other hand, if people are searching for an identity based on human-centered notions of happiness and fulfillment, the impact of sin on our perceptions and wills ensures that we will try to ground our identity in places that are ultimately unfulfilling. Some identities are legitimate. For example, it is good to claim national and ethnic identities, since Scripture sees no inherent contradiction with these and their understanding of human dignity. But if we ground our identity in ways of life that Scripture sees as sinful, we will experience only despair. Whether we ground our identity in a sexual orientation, a gender identity, or perhaps an identity that is good but not final, we must understand that we do not understand what it means to be truly human.

There is no better place to establish one's identity than in being made in God's image. This identity is objective, universal, and equal. While it does not call us to neglect legitimate earthly identities, it does call us to reject any identity based on sin.

3. Technology

Technology is by far the biggest social force shaping modern parenting. If you're like us, what's available to the average child today with a tablet or smartphone is unimaginable from the perspective of our childhood. While we spent our days riding our bikes around town, it's now common for teenagers to trade in-person interactions for digital ones. Overuse of social media and the algorithmic manipulation built into apps are causing a generational crisis when it comes to mental health.

There is no better place to anchor your identity than by being made in God's image.

We believe that technology is something that can be used for good. We are not Luddites and welcome technology into our homes. But technology is not simply a value-neutral resource. It is constantly shaping us and educating us in its image. Unless Christian parents consciously pursue a technology policy in their homes, a go-with-the-flow attitude will inevitably result in your home being inundated with thoughtless and harmful technology use.

4. Political hostility

As American culture has become increasingly secularized, society has pushed Christianity out of the center of the cultural self-understanding. Yes, we celebrate Christmas in America, but if someone were to bring up the Bible's teachings on marriage, they would be met with incredible hostility. This puts Christians in the United States in the awkward position of having to hold on to both their Christian and American identities. Can the two coexist? We believe they can, but it requires Christian parents to lean on their Christian identity and teach their children with ever greater purpose. This also puts a strain on Christian families as they consider how to raise their children. While public schools are the most affordable, public schools in many parts of the United States are dominated by secular forces hostile to biblical Christianity. Christians must be very careful about how their children are raised. Public schools can no longer be relied upon as an institution that broadly reflects a culture consistent with Christian values ​​– quite the opposite.

Although it may seem unthinkable given our childhood, as Christian parents in America today we must develop a “theology of persecution” for our children. Of course, not all persecution is the same. Christians overseas are persecuted far more often than Christians in America. But no matter how you look at it, hostility is still hostility. In such moments, we must teach our children what it means to bear the reproach of Christ with joy despite daunting cultural pressures.

Andrew T. Walker and Christian Walker are the authors of What do I say if…?: A parent's guide to dealing with cultural chaos for children and young people.

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